


If you're watching, I'll put on a show

by andrea_deer



Series: Kissing Meme [1]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: First Kiss, Kissing Meme, M/M, No Beta, Spies, Swearing, hints of eggsy/charlie in the name of duty, honeypot mission, listening over, seduction techniques, sort of, what?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-19
Updated: 2016-09-19
Packaged: 2018-08-16 02:39:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8083405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andrea_deer/pseuds/andrea_deer
Summary: Kissing meme: Merlin/Eggsy - 15: A kiss because I have literally been watching you all night and I can’t take anymore.   "So how about next time you try to focus on your mark and not your handler, okay?"





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MeganMoonlight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeganMoonlight/gifts).



The thing was, Eggsy thought that Merlin teaching them seduction techniques was bad.

And it was. 

_So Bad._

First of all, Charlie was still with them back then, being the cocky bastard that he was. Trying to trip Eggsy at every move and just being a total arse as per usual. Not to mention his stupid comments about how well Roxy was doing. As if watching Roxy trying to pull Merlin was not disturbing enough. (It really was. On so many levels, Eggsy is still counting the mental scars.)

To say it was bad was a gross understatement. When Harry asked him what was the worst part of the training, Eggsy didn't even hesitate. He likes to think it was because they did not ask him to shoot his fucking dog back then yet, but he's not sure if even that put some perspective on the bloody Merlin teaching them seduction techniques. And making them try said techniques out. In pairs.

(And really perhaps memories of Roxy hitting on Merlin are traumatising and Eggsy is still impressed she had the guts to go at it as she did, but trying to seduce that dick Charlie was a hell of its own. Perhaps because of how well it was going before they were interrupted.)

So yeah, the training was fucking bad, but it never prepared Eggsy for how horrible the practice will be.

Sure, he kind of assumed there will be downsides. Not every time he pulled on a job it will be for fun and pleasure. Not every time it will be a princess, either. What he did not account for was that when he was flirting or seducing for an actual job, Merlin will not politely shut himself out. He will be there, watching what Eggsy was watching and listening to every word and sound that was made.

And that should be mortifying.

And it was, really.

A bit of a turn on as well, but mostly mortifying.

And Eggsy decided to deal with it the way he always did, when he felt out of his depth - with smug, over-confidence and bratty attitude. He hit on the mark like there was no tomorrow, making sure his lines worked in the context he was in, but could also be applied to a certain stern spy who was watching over him. Sort of two in one job, he thought, he really should get some extra points for that if anyone would pick on that, of course.

He guessed he at least gave Roxy a laugh, if her muffled chuckles before he cut the line were any indication.

"Such a smart guy and with such a great body, are you sure you're only dealing with computers?"

The guy chuckled nervously, obviously flushed and Eggsy smiled at him, bright and welcoming. His gaze lingering purposefully.

"Well, I also run a class at the university... A bit of a special course..."

 _Gotcha_ , thought Eggsy. _Tell me all about the little spies you're recruiting and what you're teaching them._

"And your students actually manage to focus, while staring at you in all your teacher gear? Must be some interesting subject if they're not just sitting there fantasising of some extra-credit work they could do for you."

The guy laughed loudly and Eggsy grinned unrepentantly.

"I'm serious!"

Perhaps it was not the most typical method, but it was clearly working.

"It is actually a fascinating subject." 

"Is it? Tell me about it, then. Let's see how long I can stay focused on science, while you talk to me."

Hook, line and sinker. Eggsy simply nodded, looking interested enough, sometimes asking some question that made him look silly, but fascinated and soon they had all the details of professor Anderson's secret classes without as much as a threat.

Eggsy was just hoping Merlin was listening and saving it all, because he sure won't be able to recreate much of this technological babble.

When he excused himself and finally finished the evening's mission, he was rather proud of himself actually. He was still debating if he should go back to headquarters or straight home, when he got a message from Merlin summoning him for a report and remembered that there were still many ways he could die tonight.

He entered Merlin's office quietly, knocking first, and generally trying to not seem like an agent worth shooting.

Merlin looked up at him from the file he was reading, while leaning against the desk. He really did look like a hot-ass teacher, Eggsy thought without much repentance.

"Eggsy," Merlin greeted him. "Enjoyed yourself on the mission?"

Eggsy shrugged. "Could be worse. Why, did I bore you?" he asked with a smug grin and Merlin glared at him from behind his glasses before sighing loudly.

Eggsy was rather proud of those sighs. Especially since he heard Harry murmured _"Even I don't make him sound that exasperated"_ comment once. He always strived to beat the records Harry had set. 

"Do you know how difficult it is to fully understand this man's theory while also making sure that the mission doesn't go tits up and simultaneously checking on four other agents currently working on their assignments?"

Merlin talked slowly, threateningly, while walking closer towards Eggsy, who cringed a bit at his words. Okay, so maybe he didn't think it through really and- He wanted to somehow explain himself, but Merlin just raised his hand to silence him and went on, by now standing very close and practically invading Eggsy's personal space and looking down at him.

"So how about next time you try to focus on your mark and not your handler, okay?"

Eggsy opened his mouth to reply, but Merlin stopped him again, this time by putting a hand on his neck dragging him up for a kiss. It was certainly not the kind of first kiss Eggsy expected from Merlin. It was hot and desperate as if they were teasing each other for hours if not days. Which, to be fair, they kind of did.

He opened up eagerly for the kiss, moaning happily, but it was over far too soon.

Merlin stared into his eyes for a second longer, his hand still a hot, tight presence on Eggsy's neck.

"Next time," Merlin said, his voice even lower than usual, "try to be less distracting."

Eggsy nodded eagerly. 

"Sure thing, Merlin," he said, thinking there was no chance in hell he will even try to follow that order.

Merlin looked at him carefully before sighing in defeat and going back to his desk. Eggsy left the office grinning cheerfully enough to scare one of the new cadets. He had a feeling the seduction missions will be way more fun now.

He will just need to warn Roxy.


End file.
